BJ SYLVIA walks with an invisible ache in her heart, sinking ever deeper and never relenting for long. The tightness does not emanate guilt, anger, or regret. Instead, it betrays the soul of a mother and teacher burdened by the pain of children — some deeply hurt, others without the basic needs one would expect every child to possess. For these young ones, the Manchester woman would not trade the burden for the world because with the ache came a change that would forever alter the lives of many students touched by Manchester City Schools’ Family Resource Center (FRC).
Through the FRC, empty stomachs become full, weary feet find shoes, basic needs are met, minds learn the importance of hygiene, coats wrap shivering bodies, and gifts enter homes, making their way under Christmas trees.
Just ask the center’s director, BJ Sylvia. The Tennessee native and wife of a loving husband hails from Bradyville, a small town outside of the Coffee County area. She grew up with loving parents and three siblings on a cattle and dairy farm, where a strong work ethic wasn’t just expected but woven daily into a bittersweet farm life.
“We were shown by our parents that you work for the things you want in life, that nothing is for free,” Sylvia said. “My parents were hard workers and instilled those same qualities in me.”
In third grade, one teacher left a life-transforming mark on her, like an artist using permanent ink. Mrs. Rose’s kindness and empathy burst through Sylvia like rays of sunlight through a cloud. That mark faded into a dormant state for decades but never disappeared.
After giving birth to a daughter in 1993, Sylvia soon discovered the joy of being a mother, caring for someone or something much greater than oneself. Sylvia worked odd and end jobs during the subsequent years, but none resulted in fulfillment until her daughter started attending Hillsboro Elementary School, leading Sylvia to spend most of her time volunteering at the school.
She quickly realized that she loved supporting students, and things began to illuminate for her, like the blinds snapping open in a darkroom. In 2004, the mother found herself assisting a teacher — Mrs. Helen Blackburn — with daily tasks and classroom curriculum in the school’s exceptional ed department.
Blackburn proved to be the most influential mentor in Sylvia’s life, helping her grow and make what Sylvia described as the biggest decision of her career after giving birth to her son in 2007. She accepted the offer to work as the Family Resource Center director at Manchester City Schools.
“I remember, first and foremost, I wanted to create a warm and caring environment for students and families,” Sylvia recalled. “I began to build relationships and trust along the way.”
She launched programs like Backpack for Kids to provide food, WeCare to get basic needs, Coats for Kids, group hygiene classes, yoga classes, and more. The FRC team educated families on budgeting, health care, parenting techniques, and nutritional meals, coordinating with organizations in the community to reach success.
“There are very seldom two days that are the same,” Sylvia said. “This work can be rewarding but also extremely sad at times.”
Those times include visiting children who lack food, clothes, hygiene, and even heat during the winter.
“I will never forget the very first home visit I did and seeing firsthand these children gathered around an electric heater with limited warm clothes and food,” she recalled.
For them, Sylvia runs toward the pain like a firefighter charging into a burning house. She listens without judgment and loves without regret because they need her and others’ support.
“It weighs, but when the community all comes together, it’s so rewarding to see the love that is shared to those in need.”
In other words, it’s a love that gives back. It’s a love that looms greater than oneself. GN
