WHEN A family is in crisis, the community must step up and help. Dozens of homes in Bowling Green and the Two Rivers Region have taken that directive to heart and opened their lives to children in need in the foster care system.
According to recruitment and certification worker Fonda Walker, being a foster parent can be challenging, but it is also an incredibly rewarding experience. More importantly, there is a great need for more foster parents. While the numbers are ever-changing, in July 2024, there were over 1,100 children in foster care in the Two Rivers Region and just under 150 foster homes. Children sometimes have to stay in Walker’s office because there is nowhere for them to go.
“There are so many children that are in foster care, possibly even waiting for adoptive parents, and we just don’t have enough families to take them all,” Walker said.
After seeing the effects of fostering in the school system, Curtis Adams and his wife chose to become foster parents. As educators, they saw children who were in the classroom one day and then removed and placed elsewhere the next simply because no family nearby could take them. They felt called to fill this need.
The Adams were approved as foster parents in 2012 and have since fostered seven children, one of whom they adopted. It is a difficult path emotionally, but Adams said it helps to look at it as assisting an entire family, not just a child.
“Maintain that commitment to the welfare of the family as a unit and understand that when we are contributing to the welfare of families, then we are contributing to the welfare of our community at large,” Adams said. “It’s more than just ‘I’m fostering this child’; it’s ‘I’m walking alongside this family who happens to be in crisis so that they can get into a better situation.’”
Adams considers his most significant wins as a foster parent to be the reunifications he has been a part of.
“We see them really wanting what’s best for their children, and so that’s something we can come alongside of and encourage and celebrate,” Adams said.
A foster placement can last a few weeks, a few months, or a few years and could be for one child or a set of five siblings. According to foster parent Lara Mattingly, the most significant need is for families who can take older children, sibling groups, or medically complex kids.
“Just be a soft place for kids to land — I mean, just to love them like you would any other kid who would ever be in your home,” Mattingly said.
Not everyone can foster, of course, but there are many other ways to help. Mattingly began her foster parent journey as a respite placement, but now she is president of The Network, a recruiting, training, and support resource for foster parents. While she still fosters, her passion has changed.
“I love supporting and just coming alongside foster families and just sort of getting the community involved as well,” Mattingly said. “Not everybody can foster, I realize that, but it’s my belief that everybody can definitely do something to help with the needs in our foster care community.”
Support can be as simple as a listening ear or a home-cooked meal. It can also mean donating clothing, toys, or other necessities when a foster family receives a placement without notice. Lauren Thomas experienced this firsthand. She and her wife had been approved as foster parents for three days before they got a call — a 10-week-old child needed a place to stay.
“We took that 10-week-old little girl in February 2021 [with] a foot of snow on the ground,” Thomas said. “Within 24 hours, our home — just because the foster care community is so large — was filled with everything and anything a 10-week-old little girl could possibly need.”
Thomas said the foster parent’s role is to love, support, and advocate for the children going through the fostering journey. It is hard, but there is a huge need for good families to fill that role. Anyone can do it, whether they are single or married or whether they are a typical family or not. The first step is to talk to a foster parent and learn more about the process.
“My hope for Bowling Green is that we never ever have another child that has to stay in the office,” Walker said.
To facilitate that process, Walker and others at the Department for Community Based Services offer the necessary foster parent training six to eight times a year. It is a seven-week course that walks prospective families through the statutes, regulations, and what to expect in a foster parent’s day-to-day life.
“It’s a great way for us to connect with the families,” Walker said. “A few of them will drop out because maybe it’s not the right time, or maybe they just don’t really feel like they can do what we’re asking of them, so they drop out. Whether at the end of the seven weeks, we only have one family, or if we have 10 families, we’re blessed.”
They bless the whole community as well. GN
