COFFEE FROM a favorite mug, their children’s hugs, and that exhausted feeling from a hard day’s work—all these little things were traded for soul-numbing choices leading to their incarceration. A lot of things are missing from life inside the Bedford County Correctional Facility (BCCF), but something unexpected is present. It’s hope, and every particle of air in the meeting room is saturated with it.
As soon as the first words are spoken, you forget that not everyone in the room is going home tonight, but you know they’ll each go home before long as women who see themselves and their problems differently. For most, it’s the first light they’ve ever allowed to shine into their souls long enough to let it do its best work because life had taught them there was nothing good to be found.
Some bring their workbooks to turn in, but every single one of them has begun the task of trading in their perception of self and their past for a plan for a brighter future. It’s not something that’s been handed to them; it’s something they are earning through hard work, honest reflection, and planning.
It’s more than a 16-step program. Moral Reconation Therapy (MRT) at BCCF is creating space for healing and recovery thanks to those responsible for bringing it to the facility and directing it. With the overflowing support of Sheriff Austin Swing and jail administrator Ronnie Prince, Lieutenant Chris Cook has an earnest desire to see participants reenter society with a new way of processing life. For most, if not all, Cook is the first man who sees them and their potential and wants nothing more from them than to see them succeed.
“This program is not just designed for them while they’re here. We’ve got people outside supporting them until they’re stable enough not to need us anymore. We’re helping them get into rehab or get a job and making sure they have a safe place to live before they get out of jail. We’re lining up this path for them, and we’re offering them support long after they’ve been out of jail,” said Cook.
Desiree Mullis, director of the Full-Moon Healing Project, was hooked after sitting in on the group’s meeting. She became MRT-certified and works with Cook, along with the group of participants in the program, and she also works in trauma therapy. Mullis, who is recovering from a former addiction and a survivor of domestic abuse, knows the secret ingredient to the program’s success.
“[The women] have said it themselves. ‘Cook gave us a spot where we didn’t feel like we were going to be taken advantage of by a man. He’s the first male in our lives that didn’t expect something in return. All he wanted was for us to be honest.’ And that’s why it provided such a healing space. Not only did he provide MRT, but he’s gone above and beyond to provide any kind of supporting program that the males and the females need because that’s a part of their healing journey. And so, for them, being in jail and having Cook is a safe space to heal, move forward, and give back.”
Cook expected trust would take longer to build.
He said, “I knew we’d go through some stages. Trust doesn’t just happen right off the bat; I went into it with that expectation. But the very first night, they showed signs that they were already starting to trust me a little bit, and by the second class, they opened up, gave their testimonies, were honest with each other, and started to trust me. It happened organically right from the beginning, and the second class was the same way.”
Experience taught them that anyone interested in them would soon be demanding or taking something from them. Life and their circumstances taught them to lie, steal, manipulate, and do anything necessary to get what they needed. And what they needed always came back to anything that kept them from feeling the things that had hurt and haunted them. MRT has stepped them through naming and feeling these dark turns and twists, many of which were initially beyond their control, happening to them as children. It’s given them the ability to see which things they had no control over and which things they willingly chose.
Participants receive tools and resources to change their lives, their families, and the community around them.
Nothing does that better than hope.
And while we could look deeper at the MRT program and its steps, nothing and no one explains what it offers in Bedford County better than the participants.
Words like relationship, sisterhood, advocate, trust, honesty, forgiveness, value, and love are spoken through tears and laughter. Every single woman in the room shares from her heart what the program is doing in her life.
“It really means the world to me because I’ve made a lot of bad decisions, but it’s taught me that I can be successful, confident that I can do the right thing, and everything’s gonna be fine.”
“One of the greatest things I’ve accomplished was graduating MRT. Nothing can take that from me. That’s something I have never ever acknowledged or even considered—doing something that made me proud of myself. And I am very proud of myself.”
“It’s sisters because you can argue with each other, and then, literally minutes later, you’re laughing about something. I’ll do something stupid, and they’ll make fun of me, but it’s okay because they’re my family. It is a family and a sisterhood.”
“The program makes you want to change. It’s forced me to address things that I don’t like to address. But I also have people that support me to do that, and I can trust them as a sister in a healthy way.”
“Until I started MRT, I didn’t realize my decision-making process was all messed up. Once I got out some of my guilt and trauma, I realized my self-esteem had something to do with the decisions I was making. As I got all that out, I started making better decisions. I don’t wonder now; I know how I got here. I know that if I make the right decisions I’m not going to end up back in jail. I’m not going to overdose or sell somebody a drug that [will] hurt them.”
And what really sums it up?
“Cook, you put your heart into this program. Not just this program; you put your heart into us, and I thank you for that— for the belief you’ve had and still have in me. For you to trust me on the outside the way you do, means a lot. You made this program with the heart that you put [into] it.”
Heart, hope, and healing have come into the jail, and new life is walking out of it. GN
